Change your phone number (if you can).
Change your name (if you can).
Move away (if you can, the further the better).
Make fun of his mother (if you can not realistically accomplish the first three).
Avoid places you hung out together.
Do not give him nor anyone else the satisfaction of a “crazy” reaction.
Realize that with some, you may be just simply cursed and stuck with maybe even forever.
Avoid all legal drama, sadly, these are always the legally dramatic.
Don’t trust anyone who knows him and be skeptical of advice from strangers.
Do whatever possible to avoid his leaching onto the one’s you love.
Distance yourself from traitors within your family and friends.
Protect your kid(s) as best you can.
Self-pampering is essential.
Living well is the best revenge.
Exercise to deal with the stress if you are forced to share your child with said person.
Do not, for any reason, believe anything this person tells you especially if he is psychologically abusive and/or insecure.
Do not bad mouth to your kids but do prepare your kids to be alone with this lovely and wonderful human being.
If your child is very young and there is a history of abuse and/or neglect and you have been abandoned by the “system” teach your child to scream bloody murder if he/she is in danger.
Don’t stop believing in karma, what goes around comes around, this can offer some peace during his toxicity.
Try to keep the faith that this too shall pass and maybe one day fail to repeat.
NOTE FROM THE AUTHOR: This article is not based on any particular person and is only intended for satirical purposes.